There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
So getting drunk in honor of the bomb threat is legit right?
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
He is currently passed out on his toilet. Point day drinking.
Hurry I'm alone dressed like a prostitute eating French fries.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Randomize
