I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
And just when I was about to fall asleep, he hit me in the face, and claimed he's a "violent sleeper".
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
I'll report later on the progress of the mountain orgy
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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