this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Is it because I queefed?
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Sacagawea was the original milf.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
He asked for a foot job. Whatever. I guess I'm swimming in new slut waters tonight.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
he was like tryna hang and chat and I was like dude there's an iguana in this room
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
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