I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
i said good morning to each one of his abs personally
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
How do I un-spend everything I bought last night? Seriously...was a penis shaped piñata and enough tequila to fill my bathtub really that necessary?
At least you can say you've literally dumped money down the drain
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
Randomize