Me. At least after what I've been through.
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Randomize
