i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
Cumming on a girls face is guy code for you're not wife material.
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
So if her brother fucks my brother, can I just tell her that anal sex is in her genes?
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
She was hammered and showed her gay best mate a pic of my cock, his response was "I fucked the wrong brother"
On a side note apparently my brother is gay
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
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