dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Welcome to drink and talk like a Russian afternoon.
Pirate drinking day will be planned for shortly
I approve this so hard.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
Randomize
