we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I've decided that my night was probably over when I started eating the penne vodka with my hands.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
Some nice lady just gave me a beer out of her purse. I love youth hockey
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
Just cuz I'm recovering alcoholic does NOT make me the taxi for you every weekend
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize