Happy hour is for amateurs. Been drunk since 1230. Fell asleep in a disney viewing of UP. Went to the roosevelt and drank more. Now im stumbling around the grove.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I can feel your judgement through the phone
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
