Its like they don't get that I only talk to them before homecoming, thanksgiving, or any other time I go home. I love highschool girls.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I wish men found my impeccable aim when spitting into the sink attractive.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Who am I kidding? With my track record, I'm going to end up sleeping at the strip club with just nipple tassels on.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
You have a penis. Therefore everything you say is automatically wrong.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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