you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
rhymes with "ouble enetration"
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
He had one of those small greek statue penises
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
trying to imitate man vs food after 12 shots doesnt mean youll get laid
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I asked him why I was having sex with him in the middle of having sex. It was sufficiently awkward.
You called me your momma bear, and then demanded more vodka
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
