i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
can you blame him?
i blame him for everything, HE GOT ME PREGNANT
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
That kid who fell through your coffee table is here. In a toga.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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