You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
i left after you tried to balance a shot of tequila on your head while screaming at the bar tender that you fucked his girlfriend
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
I ate cinnamon toast crunch. I'm officially out of the puke zone. Blackout drunk Friday. WHAT IS GOOD.
And then he told me he was too tired for me to suck his dick. Physically and mentally too tired for me to suck his dick. What the fuck?
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Don't worry. I have logic.... just not morals.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
Randomize