I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
These shoes are way too nice for a walk of shame. Its how I keep myself in line.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
yeah...well...life isn't all puppies & lap dances
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
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