we're all still whores. we just have a theme song now.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
That's the point of day drinking, get fucked up by 6pm so you can get stuff done the next day. It's the adult thing to do.
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
how did my horoscope know i was too hungover to operate a stove.
He played pinball with my ovaries. He won.
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
I think i got beer on your cat.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
