Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
you face planting the wall was epic
did you at least save my tooth
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Nobody cheats on THIS.
Randomize
