1:32 am: your girlfriend looks like a man
1:48 am: your uglier
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
I'm pretty sure he's lost all respect for me. it probably happened somewhere around the time i had officially slept with every single one of his friends..
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
i repeatedly had to ask him if he was into this because he kept talking about random things while i jerked him off. i got annoyed and in order to annoy him back, i told him i wanted to watch him do it. he also talked about basketball WHILE cumming. NEVER AGAIN.
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
All I know for sure is, I went to bed drunk and I woke up in a relationship..I think I need to reevaluate my drinking skills.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
