I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Omg 230 lb butch lesbian with a mustache grabbed my dick. I need an adult
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
fuck sobriety. I want to wake up tomorrow in a park or some shit.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
