hey babe. i'll pick you up in my mom's car. with my mom. she has nothing to do tonight.
addddeeerrraaaallll.
ok i'm not sure if that was a success statement or a cry for help.
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
Oh my god. Just had sex with this girl on the boardroom table at my work at midnight (win!) just realized I left the condom wrapper on the table (lose!)
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
sorry for any reference made toward your boobs or making you feel pregnant or incapable of peeing. make it a wonderful day.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
