I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
Just got my period. This just makes my beach escapade totally even that much more ok.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Remember that girl that we found passed out in the dorm study room under a pile of money and jimmy johns wrappers? She's standing right on front of me.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
My body hates me. Pretty sure I drank 3 pitches full of coffee last night and took two adderal. I slept and ran a marathon at the same time. You should see my bed.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
Randomize