She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Its like im going on a blind date, but ive already had sex with her
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
4 pharmacies and not one had Plan B. If this is gods way of telling me it's time for a child, he can fuck off.
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Randomize
