I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
BRING THE BAGELS
AND ONCE AGAIN, MY VAGINA HAS STRUCK AGAIN. HER PLANS TO TAKE OVER MARYLAND ARE WELL ON THEIR WAY AS SHE CONTINUES TO ENGULF EVERY QUEER IN A 10 MILE RADIUS
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
