Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I have finally found someone I enjoy for reasons that do not necessarily include his dick
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize