If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
I used to not like fucking fat girls but with her gut clapping against her boobs, its like a standing ovation ever time.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
Randomize
