He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Tuesday Boozeday turned into What-the-fuck-were-you-thinking Wednesday real fast.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
I deserve this hangover.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
