No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
