my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Doug is wearing your sports bra fyi
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Walked by a shop giving away free donuts this morning. Best walk of shame ever
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
I've been told that their best stripper is on maternity leave. NEVER AGAIN.
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
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