Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
i just masturbated in footie pajamas. there's no judgement here.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
I’m never getting home or fucked or eating hot Taco Bell fml
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