We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize
