Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
I can feel the fear and stress bubbling in my stomach. Or maybe that is the pregnancy.
Yea no bueno and I only brought enough weed to last one night. And it was no Hanukah nug, it didn't last 8 days.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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