See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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