Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
We put you in the box and you started to cry, that's how high you were.
jump out the window naked night went bad
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