hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
so jimmy johns showed up at our party last night. our house is sponsored now. living the dream.
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
My brother just asked if I would keep having one nighters with that guy because he really likes the organic cotton v-necks he leaves behind.
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Just give me 5 advils and some sunglasses and I'll knock out on this couch no problem.
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Randomize