He probably put up nude pics. He seems like that kind of guy.
halloween makes it hard to decipher real cops... from sexy men dressed up as them.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Nobody has seen her in 3 days. Should we call the cops or hope this is just another drunk Carmen San Diego game she's playing?
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
Do you know how hard it is to put a bandaid on a vagina?
new low: I blocked him from seeing my snapchat story in hopes he will text me because he'll be afraid I'm dead or something
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
