he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
You dropped me off at the wrong girl's house.
There's no such thing as a "wrong girl" make it happen.
alright see you in the morning.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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