I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
For gods sake, I only took one. With two nyquils. What a happy world its been today. Fulfill your obligations and then its marvelouso.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Just think how much she’ll hate me when she finds out I fucked her father
Randomize
