Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
I know how I'm going to make my fortune.. designing an icepack made specifically for the vagina.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
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