i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
May or may not be going home with my jamitor. i'm kiddong, btw, i have no idea. i'll let you know soooon.
2 out of 3 people here lost their shoes. America.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
I dont know if you relize this but ive been high ly medicated in my room for a whil now. GOing out into the real world would make me li ke tom ha nks. im not ready to be tom hanks..
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize
