i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
and that's why he's hiding in the taco suit
I don't understand how 5 bottles of booze became normal or acceptable per 2.5 people
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Think of the things uve done in the past. And ask urself "have I done worse?" If u answer yes. Its perfectly ok.
the fact that I can still put my shoes on is a testament to the fact that I can outdrink these bros
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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