her vagine was all disorganized.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I did this clutch move yesterday at the bar where I grabbed a plastic cup for water and discreetly threw up in it while walking around and then tossed it. It was my best boot and rally ever
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
