i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
Barsexuality is the new black.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
