Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
i woke up this morning cuddling with a 3 foot statue of Jesus. heaven here i come
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I'm genuinely dissapointed that we didn't make any fat chicks cry
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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