Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
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