Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
This girl just swallowed a pealed banana whole. I'm not worthy.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I have fence marks all over my body
*6am blends another margarita* *615am blends straight tequila*
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
