yo i stole a wine glass from the ritz but i spilled wine on my hundo dolla shirt
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize
