oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
I feel like I spend my weeks apologizing for my weekends.
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
BITCH IT IS YOUR BIRTHDAY AND I'M STARTING ON A FISHBOWL OF LIQUOR WITHOUT YOU
I read that out. Group response is "Katie is hard as fuck."
WITH MOTHERFUCKING MONKEY MITTENS
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