Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
See this is what happens when we don't have sex everyday
You kept ranting how Captain Planet is getting shortchanged in the superhero department. Other than that you kept it together
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
GO RIDE HIS EYEBROWS INTO THE SUNSET
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
Randomize
