I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
Apparently getting dressed is an all-day activity.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Want to help me interview candidates to replace my Cub/Boy Toy when he leaves for grad school next month?
Randomize
