Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
Everything's a blur with pockets full of jello
I peed in my sheets during a dream. Like straight up. A whole new drunk.
So hung over, I told one of the candidates she's hired if we can turn the lights off and take a nap instead of doing her interview. I feel like she has potential.
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
Life update - currently drunk off my ass in the yoga room of SFO at 5:30 in the morning.
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
So last night was the first of "I got cut off before I walked in the bar".
I am going to bedazzle the shit out of your Basilisk costume.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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