I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
am i gonna have visuals on this?
you are gonna see the trees puking up fireworks and ninja pheonixes will shit rainbows and fire
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
There is a reason my most meaningful relationship since 2012 has been with Duracel...
We probably are going to die. So. Thanks for agreeing to be my Maid of Honor even though I torture you.
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