Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I hate that the only Italian aspect of me is I get red and sweaty when I drink
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
He showed up to a baby shower and kept telling everyone he was late because he was pregaming. And then tried honking the pregnant girls tits
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
His pet bird was perched ON HIS DICK.
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